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| Blogs > kzoopair > Take two- they're small |
Re-post: How I met PD by Bill
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Re-post: How I met PD by Bill How I Met PD I was in a bad marriage for eighteen years. I'm not suggesting there were no good times, but I'm not going to write about them, and I'm not going to write about that marriage at all. It was my third. You can get to feeling like maybe you're doing something wrong, or even that there's something wrong with you, when you've failed at marriage three times. I had got tired of packing up and moving on, and tired of splitting up possessions, too. I liked my possessions. I had some nice ones- an old brick house on acreage in wine country, just east of Lake Michigan, four dogs with three acres fenced for us to run and play on, an old barn that housed my antique woodshop, and a pile of old tools that I used in it. But for the last ten years of that marriage I had pondered ways to get out of it that wouldn't hurt too much. There weren't any. It was going to hurt. I finally realized that, and that I was going to have to bite the bullet and take the pain. Once I did I began looking at other women. I had never been a cheater or a philanderer. I always had an eye for a cute ass and even more an ear for a smart and entertaining woman, but I kept a lid on that and didn't fool around until I decided my marriage was over and not coming back. I met a woman online- she messaged me ten years ago on Thanksgiving morning, in fact, and we met and then spent time together and had sex. She was a lot of fun, and I liked her. I didn't spend much time thinking about where that relationship was going, or whether it was even going anywhere. It was just nice to spend some time with a woman that wasn't all argument and recrimination, that was just fun. We saw each other when we could for a couple of months, but by then I was used to reading women's profiles on dating sites so I kept at it, and never found much that caught my eye, especially. Not that it mattered much. I had decided my marriage was done and all I was doing was killing time while I got my ducks in a row to file for a divorce. The woman I was seeing now and then asked me what was going to happen with us after I was divorced and I answered that I didn't see any reason why anything should change. We could go on liking each other and having lunch together and fucking once in a while. But I wasn't interested in having another wife or even a live in partner. On the thirteenth of February 2005 I saw a profile on what folks here call a vanilla dating site for a Cat Owning Democrat, a woman in South Bend, Indiana, about fifty miles from the little town where I lived and seventy miles from where I worked every day. Not a real likely proposition- the logistics of a thing like that were bound to be tough. But I read the profile and she sounded kind of fun so I sent an email to her suggesting that we had a lot in common, just for the hell of it really. I never expected to even get an answer, let alone a response that would change my life, heal my bad attitude and result in the best sex of my life. She sent a response to my message: "We have a lot in common? Like what?" But she had also sent at my request a copy of a short story she had had published in a local literary magazine featuring local writers, "The Loosestrife Man". You can read it in this blog- The Loosestrife Man..... I loved it. I can't write like that. I don't think like that, but I loved that she did. It was Valentine's Day, as I recall. So I replied by listing the things we might have in common: three marriages, an interest in creative writing and in thought provoking literature, a love of good movies and even sometimes bad movies and that we were both lefties down on our luck. I even like cats. I had three in my house and one in the barn. She told me that her requirements were not particularly demanding. She realized that no one falls in love with a fifty year old woman and she wanted someone to go to the movies with and maybe fuck her once in a while. I figured I could do that much. And every word she sent my way I liked her more. She was blunt and could be kind of a smart ass, at first. She wasn't really trying to shock me so much as laying it out for me that she wasn't suffering any illusions about what might come of this online dating thing. She had met and dated a number of guys she'd first encountered online and it was all over the map except for that one place where the guy wasn't just looking to tick off items on a shopping list of requirements he had before he'd do more than stick his cock in her. She told me it boiled down to "you have a pussy, I have a dick to put in it, let's get together." A question that came up a lot was how many dates they had to have before they fucked. I told her I was married but planning a divorce and she asked me not to tell her that because she wasn't going to believe it. I could see her point. I'm pretty sure I'm not the first guy to tell that particular lie. In my case I wasn't lying and I'm also sure I wasn't the first guy to believe that either. But she decided that maybe we could have a date or two, what did she care? We lived too far apart for this to go anywhere except a couple of movie or dinner dates and maybe I'd turn out not to be a total loser in the sack, if she decided to go there. We made talk about meeting, and she joked that if I did anything weird like showing up with a donkey she was out of there. So we chatted online and talked about ourselves and asked lots of questions and we made a date for early in March. We met at fast food restaurant in Niles, Michigan and it was a glorious Sunday that comes every now and then around here, with sunshine and sixty degree weather. I brought her a stuffed donkey, the Shrek donkey. You squeezed it and it made wise cracks in Eddie Murphy's voice. She stuck around anyway- I was wearing my most attractive black crew neck sweater. Neither of us wanted fast food so we drove to a Greek restaurant south of there, the kind with a ten page menu and terrific food but not fancy, where the families that were just getting out of church took Grandma every weekend. It was crowded and she and I did not notice that right off. I couldn't see much of anything but PD that day. After eating we drove to a lovely riverside park downtown and walked along the riverbank. She was an awful driver, and she told me that her hated riding when she drove. I lied and told her that she was doing just fine. In truth her driving made me nervous as all hell. She would stomp the gas and then let off like she was driving a Model T and there were no slow and measured stops- she stomped the brake pedal with the same enthusiasm that she used to kick the accelerator into submission. Her driving wasn't a deal breaker- I made a mental note that I would be driving during any future engagements. She had a couple of qualities that trumped automotive expertise. She had shining short red hair and beautiful round full breasts and was very pretty in a tight red knit shirt that I was sure she had found in an oriental boutique. That afternoon was magical. We talked and walked and sat on park benches and kissed and people smiled at us when they walked by because we were oblivious to anything but each other. At our age, no less! We only spent a few hours together but we made a date to meet again in two weeks. This time she would drive to me. In our chats during the weeks following that date became a meeting in a motel. I had wanted to fuck her from the minute I set eyes on her and it was incredible to me that she was just as eager. PD booked a motel in Kalamazoo for a Saturday and I got there early. She was late. She got lost and drove right through Kalamazoo and headed for Battle Creek, but she stopped and called me, and I managed to talk her in like an air traffic controller when the pilot and co-pilot get food poisoning and an exotic dancer has to land the plane. One of the bad movies. Her birthday was coming up and I had brought presents. She gave them a perfunctory examination- one was a book on how to have an affair- and showed me the movies she had brought for when we were done having sex. Yep. She really brought movies. She thought we'd spend fifteen minutes fucking, if it was good, and that would be that. We didn't watch them and she didn't do any reading. We spent six hours in that shitty motel room with nail clippings on the floor and every minute of it we were touching. We didn't fuck like porn stars. NOBODY fucks like porn stars. We fucked like who were falling in love with each other, and that's how we both felt. PD was the someone I could talk to that I had never had. She understood me as if we had known each other forever. And when she talked I wanted to listen- she actually had something to say. It was like coming alive. It really was spring, and it felt like spring. Suddenly life had possibilities. I went from trying to extricate myself from a bad situation and maybe hooking up for sex now and then to knowing that I wanted to spend forever with this woman and that she would make everything worth doing. She had fixed me in about four weeks. PD gave me hope again. I knew that there couldn't be any waiting. I filed for a divorce that week. It didn't matter if I was prepared or not, I knew I did not want to live without PD and that was the first thing I could do to show it. That decision cost me a lot, but it gained me everything. I could play it over a million times in my head and I wouldn't change a detail because I found the love of my life, my soul mate, and there's never been any doubt about that. This was all random dumb luck. We each had a history of making bad choices in love. If you go over all the steps that led to us meeting it's obvious that it's just chance, and no one would have given odds on the two of us. We weren't even figured to place or show let alone win. Never give up. The experts and the statisticians know nothing. At the end of May I moved to South Bend. It was a seventy mile trip one way to work in Kalamazoo. I had to get up at three thirty Indiana time to make it to work by seven Michigan time. But it was either that or spend the whole week without PD, and only see her on weekends. I made that drive for twenty three months, through the snow belt. Some of those trips took me three hours in a blizzard. I thought about transferring to South Bend to work and she looked for jobs in Kalamazoo. I'd have had to give up my nearly twenty years seniority in such a transfer, and they offered me a couple of supervisor jobs that I didn't want and turned down. I kept driving to Kalamazoo, a hundred and forty miles a day. Weekends were heaven, and a blur. We went to movies. We went out for breakfast. We had pizza at Polito's, and almond duck at Hi Ho Chop Suey…really, that's the name of it! I taught her to drive a stick shift- and we never argued. We bought second hand furniture for her empty house at the second hand stores. She bought sexy clothes to seduce me and we wrote erotic stories just for each other. We spent a lot of time in bed. I was at the end of my rope after a snowy February in 2007 when every trip was taking me more than the hour and a half it should have. It snowed constantly, it seemed. Something had to change. I was seriously considering the transfer, when PD got a job offer at a big international bank in Kalamazoo. She'd have to take a pay cut for at least the first couple of years, but she hated her job in South Bend and she jumped on that job offer. So that's how I reformed a lifelong Hoosier and brought her to safety north of the border. The rest is just trivia and details. She's learned to love it as much as I do here. But when I think back on that two years I lived in the decaying post industrial hell that South Bend is fast becoming, I don't see it as the rough going that it actually was, and I don't think of the place as a rotting midwest factory town. I have fond and warm memories of the place. It was only eight years ago but I have a nostalgia for the place as if it were the cradle of my childhood. For us it was like being drugged, we enjoyed each other so much. We cherished our time together and made the most of it and the most of it was quite grand. In our fifties we had done the impossible and fallen in love and that's all we acknowledged about our lives- how grand it was and how much fun we had together. It continues. We're comfortable with each other, but we were never un-comfortable once we got past the "Like what?" phase. I told her very early on that I wanted someone who actually liked ME- not my steady job or my paycheck or my stuff. I wanted someone I could just hang out with and fuck around with and have fun with. I wanted a woman I could listen to, who had ideas about things and thought about something besides what color the drapes should be or whether someone at work got something that SHE should have got. I didn't care what had happened in her past- I wanted to know her but I wasn't about to start a checklist of thing she could and could not be guilty of having done. My own slate isn't exactly squeaky clean and I wanted us to start fresh because we liked each other in addition to loving each other. I have never liked another human being the way I like my wife. I love her deeply and unreservedly and I still love seeing her naked. But maybe more importantly, I like hiking in the woods with her, and going to a movie with her, and I like just sitting inside on a cold winter night and shooting the shit with her. I like my wife and I like my life. Become a member now and get a free tote bag. |
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Wonderful... You are a very lucky couple to have found each other. Vive La Difference
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I love that movie where the exotic dancer lands the plane! That was Charo, right? When it lands she says "cuchi cuchi!". I now see the advantage to short term memory loss, it's like I was reading it for the 1st time. I'll be honest, when I see a long post I tend to scan and skip parts, but I turned off the volume on the football game and savored every word, even double read over a few parts. I love the donkey part, what a smart ass!  And the part about a woman liking you and not your stuff, that is such a game ender for me. I used to drive 70 miles twice on weekends to fuck a woman, I told myself it was worth it, but it wasn't. I'm inspired! There is hope for the rest of us! Excellent read!Become a member now and get a free tote bag.
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We never even considered failure. It just wasn't an option. If we'd just had a band we coulda been a 1930s romantic comedy. Especially me- I'm considerably funnier than she is.  Ask her!Become a member now and get a free tote bag.
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What a great comment. Thank you. The sex was and is great...but we were talking about exactly that today. I don't care for rating my sexual experiences, you know, best blowjob, best coitus, best cunnilingus. Some events are naturally memorable for a variety of reasons. For both PD and I, the best sex ever is with each other, because of how we feel about each other. I'm not even going to think about a zero to ten rating system. The married sex we have when you wake up in the middle of the night and just have perfunctory sex- that's perfect sex for me. And the kind we have when we hype it all day, and plan a night out, get dolled up and tease each other, and then draw it out and finally get it on- that's perfect sex too, because I love her. Who needs numbers? Become a member now and get a free tote bag.
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Thank you Sassy. I never though I'd find anyone I was willing to work so hard for. I was wrong! I never once worried about losing something of myself in this relationship. She made me better than what I was. Become a member now and get a free tote bag.
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Wonderful... You are a very lucky couple to have found each other. Become a member now and get a free tote bag.
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This is such a great story! No matter how many times I read it, and this isn't a second or third time, I can't help but think how lucky both of you are. You found your best friend, your soul mate and the love of your life. All in one person. That Grand Bitch Fate had done good, finally. I'm so very happy for you both!  Visit my blog It's a Mad, Mad, Mad World of NaughtyInSO, leave a comment, become a watcher. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ LIVE AND LET LIVE Be happy! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
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Your story does give me hope.  I loved the profile she had on the dating website... cat owning Democrat. I guess that might deter quite a few guys eh? LOL But you were not deterred. We are all the better for that for sure. Your happiness shines through in your blog. May you have many love filled years to come.Fucking loser! he was so brainwashed by Faux News he just couldn't imagine it! We wish we'd met thirty years ago. She say we'd have had a lot kids- foul mouthed space cadets. We're going to take whatever time is given to us, and live for today. I hope it's a lot! Become a member now and get a free tote bag.
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This is such a great story! No matter how many times I read it, and this isn't a second or third time, I can't help but think how lucky both of you are. You found your best friend, your soul mate and the love of your life. All in one person. That Grand Bitch Fate had done good, finally. I'm so very happy for you both! Become a member now and get a free tote bag.
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You know, Lala, I do agree with that- you should all be so blessed. And especially you. Become a member now and get a free tote bag.
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I'm pleased you re-posted this beautiful account of how a very touching relationship started.  
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I'm pleased you re-posted this beautiful account of how a very touching relationship started. Become a member now and get a free tote bag.
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Bill. What is with the barnyard animals (donkeys really?) and you . . . NO . . . never mind, I don’t think anyone wants to know. PD has done you, and the animal world in general, a great service by taking you off the market. Again, Excellent story you both write very descriptively. It is very interesting to read the story from both sides of it. I hope it remains as good for you 2 for as it has been. When the going gets weird, the weird turn pro. The only thing we have to fear is fear itself.
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Bill. What is with the barnyard animals (donkeys really?) and you . . . NO . . . never mind, I don’t think anyone wants to know. PD has done you, and the animal world in general, a great service by taking you off the market. Again, Excellent story you both write very descriptively. It is very interesting to read the story from both sides of it. I hope it remains as good for you 2 for as it has been. Become a member now and get a free tote bag.
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You're welcome and thank you for that, Kinky. We each got more than we were looking for. Become a member now and get a free tote bag.
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Thanks, Vixen. Donkey has an honored place in our home. That Donkey was surreal. He'd start talking randomly when he hadn't been touched. We let his batteries run down- he was up on a shelf for over a year- and one night while we were watching TV he began talking a blue streak. I had to take the batteries out to get him to stop. Become a member now and get a free tote bag.
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Your story does give me hope. I loved the profile she had on the dating website... cat owning Democrat. I guess that might deter quite a few guys eh? LOL But you were not deterred. We are all the better for that for sure. Your happiness shines through in your blog. May you have many love filled years to come.Become a member now and get a free tote bag.
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I love your love story. Thank you for sharing it with us all.
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I love your love story. Thank you for sharing it with us all. Become a member now and get a free tote bag.
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This is also my first time of reading how you two met. Awwww...  how beautiful and blessed event!!I'm sorry if the stories of my life often reveal no hope, but see, I had all of it in my life, and it's gone.......expecting to happen twice is really unrealistic. Love to both of you!!!!! WITHOUT PASSION LIFE IS NOTHING
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This is also my first time of reading how you two met. Awwww... how beautiful and blessed event!!I'm sorry if the stories of my life often reveal no hope, but see, I had all of it in my life, and it's gone.......expecting to happen twice is really unrealistic. Love to both of you!!!!! Become a member now and get a free tote bag.
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Thank you, Bill. Your story warms my heart and helps to release some of the pain of loving another Bill who did not love me back. I wrote about it in FWB A Cautionary Tale for the Sixteenth Virtual Symposium
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Thank you, Bill. Your story warms my heart and helps to release some of the pain of loving another Bill who did not love me back. I wrote about it in FWB A Cautionary Tale for the Sixteenth Virtual Symposium Become a member now and get a free tote bag.
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