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| Blogs > rm_bella_ > Confessions Of An Italian |
I Want You....
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I Want You.... It is amazing how our sense of being is affected by everything that happens to us in our lives no matter how big or small, good or bad. Last night I spent the evening at home alone by choice, cleaning and doing laundry. I sat down to watch a movie and then slipped into bed when my phone rang. I was my friend D asking me to go over. By that time it was already around 1:30 am, but I agreed as the sound of silence and my own breathing was becoming almost frightening. I decided to spend the night there with her. I got in my car and drove and as luck had it I had to pull over because of a flat tire. Now if you want to see me completely freak out that would have been the moment. I was alone on the highway late at night and was terrified. I don’t know how to change a tire but I thought I could try. I opened the trunk and found the tire. I saw the jack and had no idea how to use it. I tried pulling out the tire without breaking a nail and that was a battle lost almost immediately. I was screwed. I pulled out my cell phone and called D and of course as usual she was no help as she can’t change a tire either. As I was about to call a male friend with some upper body strength I saw a police car stop behind me. The officer got out and I swear I almost immediately started to shake. He said something or other and I caught none of it. Finally I got my senses back and understood that he had asked me if I needed help. This officer was so nice that he changed my tire for me right there on the highway. As he was working I noticed how hot this cop was! He had these icy blue eyes to die for and I could tell through his shirt that he worked out. I kept imagining myself in bed with him, him using his handcuffs on me, his blue eyes staring at me as he came. I even imagined him between my legs making me purr as I came all over his lips...all as he changed my tire, glancing over at me often enough and smiling. I think this was the first time in my life I have not been able to flirt with a man and that is not normal for me. He finished up my tire and I thanked him. He completely kept eye contact with me the entire time he spoke to me. I was praying “please ask me out, please ask me out!” He was walking back to his car when he turned around and approached mine again. He asked if he could call me sometime. I said yes without hesitation and gave him my number. And then the doubts as I was driving away. Is he going to call me? Why didn’t I ask for his number? Did I look nice? I should have bent over in my skirt….my hair is a mess….I drove myself crazy. I resigned myself to the fact he wasn’t going to call. But low and behold my phone rang this afternoon and it was him asking me out for tonight. I accepted of course. The sexual chemistry just by standing beside him was incredible. I have never felt this intensity before. So tonight I am out for dinner with Mr. blue eyed police man. I am in a dizzy trying to relax. I have my little outfit and shoes picked out. A tiny tight black skirt with the slit up on of my thighs. I pretty pink Bebe halter top completely open in the back except for the string around my neck and waist. My hot Versace strappy shoes and my Jean Paul Gaultier perfume. Underneath I do not need a bra but I will wear these pretty Brazilian cut black Victoria’s Secret panties in the hopes he will see them. Curl my hair pretty and some body glitter and I am on my way. He wont be able to resist me! It’s been about a year and half since I have gone out with a man other than my male friends as I cut myself off from dating during and after the ordeal I went through last year. I have a severe case of butterflies. What if he doesn’t like me? What if I have become boring over the last year? God help me…I like him a lot. Insecurities. I usually do not have them in this department. I am usually quite sure of myself when it comes to men. Damaged….I have a damaged heart and soul that I cannot let him see. I want him to feel me as carefree as I was before all the men that I allowed to hurt me. I want him to see the real me and not the me due to circumstance. Why am I so worried? I don’t even know. I just don’t know. So off I am in a bit to get a quick refresher tan and then a hot bath in hopes of a hotter evening. All I can say is insecurity isn’t pretty and feels even worse. Wish me luck. Love bella  |
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8/4/2007 3:07 pm |
bonne chance avec le flic.
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Hey we all have those nervous tendencies when meeting someone for the first time. I am comfortable with my body but yet feel a liitle off when removing my clothes in front of a man, I may be intimate with, because even though I like how I look, I want the man to like how I look as well. Don't feel bad about yourself, I am sure any man would enjoy your company in and out the bedroom. If he doesn't he is a damn fool.  I am the real deal! "Come Get Me!!!"  
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8/4/2007 3:41 pm |
best of luck! if you're going to break a leg, make sure it's someone else's  ...That which does not kill me merely pisses me off!... 
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you 2 are gonna hit it off ! 
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8/4/2007 5:57 pm |
Dont sweat it just be you and go with the flow bellz thats all it aint no puzzle. Have a good time roaming the cyber streets of blogland  
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 GOOD LUCK TO YOU!!!!!
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oh my dear bella, thank you again!whenever i read your post, you always make me smile( because i can very well relate, as if you are writing a piece of "me")..well, see?your wish will come true-i wish you good luck!!kisses!
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awwwwwwwwww beautiful bella...have fun...enjoy my dear...and good luck,but i don't think you will need it...oh boy i can't wait to hear all about it..  []   Seduce my mind and my body
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You're gonna do just fine, he'll be more nervous than you ~jeff
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Trust...do you really think I wouldnt give you a follow up?
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I wish you all the best my dear!! Spero sia andato tutto bene!!! BACI!!
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